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Interview: Conran; Tiki: Matchmaker; CoE answers

  Cry of Despair                                   Issue 56, 02/02
     .JNNNN` .JNNNNNL   NNNNNN.  |  In this month's issue:
    JNNNNN) JNNNNNNNNL (NNNNNNN. |    * Exclusive interviews, as
   JNN`    JNN`    NNN (NN.  (NN)|      Vladith catches up with
  (NN`    (NN`     NNF (NN`  (NN`|      the newest imm, Conran,
  (NN.    (NN.    JNN` NNF  JNN) |      and Tinani quizzes Tiki
  (NNNNNN (NNNNNNNNN' (NNNNNNNF  |      on her Matchmaker service.
   4NNNN`  "NNNNNN`   NNNNNNF    |    * More quests.. this time
                                 |      with a Valentine's theme!
      The Cry of Despair!        |    * Return of Ask the CoE
      ===================        |    * Updates on Nations, IGPK,
   *       *                 *   |      plus the Funny Bones,
                      *          |      Poems, and more!
     *           *               |
  Editor: Khaimran                      Immortal Sponsor: Elisabet
  Staff:  Maray, Indalecio, Kuah, Begaria, Naithalia, Ilsensine,
  Myra, Shingo, Vladith, Juliana, Tinani, Mauro, Mandasa,

  Desk of the Editor

  Interview with Conran

  Tiki and her Matchmaker Quest

  The 3rd Annual RoD Awards

  Juliana's RoD 101.. This issue: Hitting
  IGPK and other news

  Quest Central.. Results, new quests and ads

  A report on the Nations of the Realms

  The return of Ask the CoE

  Funny Bones!

  Poems, cookbooks.. just Words

  Elisabet's Corner

  Desk of the Editor - by Khaimran                          Editor
  Hi there.
    Another month, another Cry. We're back to our usual length
  this month, with reporters eagerly scouring the Realms for news
  and stories in an attempt to burn off that weight gained over
  the festive period. So I'd like to thank them, and you, for
  making the Cry what it is.
    Although I previously edited the December issue of the Cry,
  this month is my first time as the permanent Editor. I don't
  expect to be perfect, so I'm appealing for your help ;) The
  general populace of the Realms are -always- welcome to submit
  articles, one-liners, praise and critisicms. The submissions
  board is located both 2s, w, 2s of DH [], and e, s, 2u, s, w, s
  of DH []. Give us your views on class balance, the quality of
  RP, send us your poems or stories, or give us a log of the funny
  thing that happened to you the other day.
    Well, I'll stop babbling now and let you get on with reading
  the 56th issue of the Cry of Despair.

     - Khaimran Quena Tar'Yenea

  Conran Interview - by Vladith                          *FEATURE*

  Last month, one of the Cry of Despair's own journalists ascended
  to Immortality. Conran, certainly not just another Treves,
  brings up the total number of imms up to 38. Vladith, one of the
  Cry's newer members, caught up with Conran a few weeks after he
  immed for a quick chat. Take it away, Vladith...  -Ed.

  He isn't much to look at...
  Conran is 5'9" and weighs 108 pounds.
  Conran is in perfect health.

  Conran is using:
  <worn about waist>  some smashing tights

  Conran grins.
  Conran> Uhh yes, don't mention anything about Iliana's dress
  sense... I can't make my own stuff...

  Vladith> Ok, you've had some time to adjust to immortality. 
  What are your impressions?

  Conran> I think the biggest thing I've noticed is how much 
  people actually do around here... I always thought that imms 
  would take up a job in a council and deal with that, but I've 
  found that people are actually doing a wide range of things, 
  much more than I'd expected.

  Vladith> How have you found your fellow immortals, maybe 
  some of those we mortals have less contact with?

  Conran> A lot more friendly and sociable than I'd given 
  them credit for when I was a mortal, for sure.

  Vladith> What were your first thoughts when you learned you 
  were being considered for immortalality?

  Conran> Shocked, obviously, but after giving it some thought
  I was pretty excited at the prospect that I might actually make 

  Vladith> What kind of things did you consider before you 

  Conran> Well I knew that I'd need to outcast from Ascendere
  and from The Symposium, so this took a bit of thought, because 
  I have a lot of friends in both places. In the end I guess the 
  thought of seeing a new side to the game made me want to give it
  a shot.

  Vladith> How did your experiences as a mortal, such as in TS
  prepare you for this new position?

  Conran> I don't think TS really prepared me much for life as
  an imm, because the two jobs are really quite different, at 
  least at my stage of immortality.  I'm not being asked to make 
  big decisions or anything yet. My time in NC was really helpful, 
  though, I learned to deal with spam, helping people out, how to 
  deal with newer players and so on.

  Vladith> Is there anything you find really surprising about 
  being an immortal that you didn't expect other than the level of

  Conran> No, not really, I think I was fairly prepared and 
  knew what I should expect for the most part.

  Vladith> Do you have a specific area in which you would like 
  to work as an immortal?

  Conran> I'd really like to get back into TS, and eventually
  move on to VC.  I want to be part of overseeing changes and 
  modifications to the game, have some input in it, and so on.

  Vladith> Is there anything in particular you'd like to 
  change about the way the game is played?

  Conran> Nothing specific comes to mind, really. I like the
  game as it is, but there's always some really great ideas put 
  forth by other players that are really interesting to look into.

  Vladith> Is there anything you'd like to say for the 
  faithful readers of the Cry of Despair?

  Conran grins.
  Conran> No, not really :P  I'm not creative on demand :(

  Vladith> I'd like to thank you for the hours you put into 
  the Cry as a mortal (as well as your other endeavors) and wish
  you the best of luck!

  Conran> Thanks =)

    - Vladith

  Tiki Sneaki, Ms Matchmaker - by Tinani                 *FEATURE*

  Ms Tiki Sneaki, pixie frolicker extraordinare has once again
  come up with a quest for Valentine's. In this one-time special,
  our intrepid reporter Tinani managed to lure Tiki with a trail
  of sugar into his studio (mud hut). He might not be as
  obnoxious as Jerry Springer, but we'll give him a chance.
  Take it away, Tinani... - Ed.

  Tinani> If dogs were made of chocolate how much red tinfoil 
  will we need to wrap them up?

  Tiki> You would wrap them???
  Tiki tsks.

  Tinani> We wouldn't want them to melt.

  Tiki> They wouldn't have a chance. 
  Tiki gives you a grin that makes you reach for your coin purse 
  to see if it's there.
  Tiki licks her lips and smiles.
  Tinani> Oh, hello there. Today we will be talking to Tiki 
  everyones favorite immortal.

  Tinani> Why did you come up with such a unique Valentine's 
  Tiki> Well, I ran it last year for the first time after a 
  friend of mine mentioned something in jest about having a 
  'personals' section of the Cry. The more I thought about it, the
  more I thought about how this game just wouldn't be the same 
  without the friendships I've developed over the years. After you
  AV, there are only so many mobs you can take on alone without 
  the help of friends. :)

  Tinani> How important is a good relationship when it comes 
  to close running?
  Tiki> I think there is a lot of trust involved in running. 
  Although you don't see it very often, there are times when 
  someone can really do a number on a running mate. Logging off in
  the middle of a fight, abandoning the group, stealing EQ, etc.
  Tinani> Can you give a ballpark figure of how many have 
  entered so far?

  Tiki> So far, I have about 40 people... I'm aiming for 100.
  That's about 20 over last year.
  Tinani> How will you match up the applications when they are
  all handed in?
  Tiki> Using the magic of the mundane called 'Excel', I take 
  all the parchments and throw them into it, and shaking it up, 
  find for each person the three people they share the most traits 
  with. It's not foolproof magic... sometimes it is opposites that 
  attract. But I try to ask questions that I think are the kind 
  that the answers should be similar. :)
  Tinani> How will you announce the final findings?
  Tiki> What I do is send to each person a list of their top 
  three matches, and the match's 'notes about themselves'. That 
  way each person can decide if they want to contact their match.
  So while you might have a list of three names, those three 
  people might not have you on their lists. The answers are 
  discussed with no one else. Only myself.

  Tinani> Will this quest be a repeating theme in coming 

  Tiki> WI hope... Although if it gets too popular, I'll need 
  help with the note writing.
  Tinani> Anything else you'd like to add about Valentine's or
  your quest?
  Tiki> There are no limits to who can enter... Mortal or 
  immortal, someone seeking a mate or just a friend, even if you 
  have friends... It's fun to see if you end up with some of your 
  current friends for matches as well. I encourage everyone to try
  it out. :) And don't be afraid to say you are a male seeking a 
  male friend, or female seeking a female. That's not uncommon.

  Tinani> If you were a flavor of Jello what flavor would you
  Tiki> Rainbow! With sparkles. :)
  Tinani> It suites you:)
  Tiki giggles at you.  Hope it's not contagious!
  Tiki> It's my favorite colour too. :)'
  Tinani> Well, thats all the time we have for tonight, I 
  would like to thank Tiki, our lovely director Elisabet and the 
  voices in my head. Goodnight,
    - Tinani

    Remember, you still have time to enter yourself into Tiki's
    Matchmaker Quest! The closing date for entries is February
    12th.   -Ed.

  The Realms of Despair Awards! - by Shingo             RoD Awards

  The Cry of Despair is hosting the 3rd Annual RoD awards. Many of
  the old categories have gone out the window, and brand new ones
  now replace them. 
  There are 24 categories to cast your vote. In order to vote, 
  take a note, and with a subject line of My Votes, cast your
  ballot for each of the 24 categories. A sample ballot sheet 
  should look like this (using note show):
  Mynamehere: My Votes
  To: Shingo
  1) My first vote
  2) My second vote
  3) My third vote
  Entries must be mudmailed to Shingo before February 24th. 
  Winners will be announced in the 57th issue of the Cry of 
  You may only have one ballot sheet per real life player. If it 
  is known that you have used more than one character to vote, 
  both players votes are nulled. A full ballot sheet is not 
  necessary. If you choose not to vote in a category, that is up 
  to you. Entries handed in after the 24th are not valid. Keep 
  your nominations within reason.
  1. Best Male Immortal
  Which male immortal has given their all to the mud.
  2. Best Female Immortal
  Which female immortal have you felt done their best.
  3. Best Male Roleplayer
  Who best exemplifies their role and yet, makes it seem natural?
  4. Best Female Roleplayer
  A queen, maiden, or wench? Whoever roleplays the fairest is 
  5. Best RoD Couple
  A new year has seen a new wave of marriages. Whose love is 

  6. Best "New change" to Realms
  Many things have been implemented for our benefit. What is the
  best so far?
  7. Worst "New change" to Realms
  There is no sweet without the sour. What change was the worst
  so far?
  8. Most memorable Quest
  Which quest were you proudest to be a part of?
  9. Best Guild
  Which Guild has been the greatest in all aspects of the game?
  10. Best Order
  Which Order has proven itself worthy?
  11. Best Clan
  Which Clan has the most feared reputation?

  12. Best Area
  Which area has you exploring for more?
  13. Best Hometown
  Now that all the hometowns are in, which one is livliest?
  14. Best Food Item
  Which food leaves a lasting impression?
  15. Best Drink Item
  Which drink quenches your thirst the best?
  16. Best "Treasure" Item
  Which treasure do you most wish to own?
  17. Most Likely to DT
  Which player do you know to be the clumsiest?

  18. Best Dressed
  Which player just leaves you in awe when they enter the room?
  19. Most Wanted to be Balzhured
  The one award you DON'T want the pleasure of winning...

  20. Best Rename
  Which player has the greatest rename, in your opinion?
  21. The "Fruit" Award
  Which player is just nonsensical, goofy and overall least 
  likely to score?
  22. Best Social
  Which social do you find a use for in EVERY situation?
  23. Best Male Player
  Which male player has inspired you?
  24. Best Female Player
  Which female player leaves you with a good impression about 

    - Shingo Solstice

  Realms of Despair  101 - by Juliana                      RoD 101

  Realms of Despair 101 - Basic Run Tactics => Hitting

  Just to review, last month we talked about how to tank well (at 
  least, well enough to improve the chances of your survival). 
  Lasting for 15 minutes against a mob isn't going to help any if 
  you can't hurt him enough. It just prolongs the inevitable when 
  you finally run out of heals.

  So this month, we're going to discuss ways to hit mobs. With 
  ten classes in this mud, players have a large variety of 
  options, some that hurt a lot, and some...Well, the damage 
  inflicted could be compared to carving an iceberg with a 
  dentist's pick.
  (Disclaimer: This article is not intended to insult anyone's 
  sensibilities, let alone diss anybody's favored class. The fact
  is that currently certain classes are better at some tasks 
  than others. Whether they are superpowered, or imbalanced, or 
  lack unique skills, is not within the scope of this article to 
  address. I'm just describing the present situation -as is-. If 
  every class was equally good at fighting, healing, magic, 
  exploring, etc. - in my opinion, it kinda invalidates the point
  of having classes. RoD doesn't limit you to one class, go play
  with them all.)

  The Basic Foundations:
  With that said, the most -efficient- way to mkill is to hit the
  mob as hard as you can, as fast as you can, until it dies. It's 
  naturally understood that you have to live/tank long enough to 
  do so.

  Below, we'll discuss hitting in terms of more and less 
  effective, simply because this article is meant to be as 
  factually helpful as I can write it. It does not naturally mean 
  that all runs must strive to be 100% efficient. Not only does it
  place the runners under a lot of stress to perform well, you 
  tend to miss out on the more fun aspects of running. Take more 
  people along for the company (they're your friends, hopefully, 
  and will stay that way after), or take less people for a 
  challenge to test your skills.

  And I have to say that I don't for one second condone massive 
  overkill. Yes, if one character hurts x amount, ten characters 
  will hurt 10x amount. But if you only need 2x to kill the mob,
  10x is overkill. The cheap thrill wears off fast, you stop 
  challenging yourself and start looking for exploits instead of 
  being proud of your skills in killing a mob the way it was meant
  to be run. 

  It cheapens your own abilities and makes them dull. It rings the
  bell for mob abuse and encourages mysterious "uppings," tunnels 
  in rooms and other multi-guards. It's anti-social, bad for your 
  mud reputation, and in the long run, hurts everyone, including 
  yourself. Turning a quick and lazy profit eventually leads to 
  the loss of one more fun to run mob.

  The ideal run is one with just enough characters for a 
  challenging, but manageable fight. I trust ya to exercise proper
  judgement, otherwise there's always learning the hard way. :/

  Primary Attacks - Hitting With a Weapon:
  Remember when you were a little level 1? You found that nifty 
  weapon in a tree, and hit a snake with it! Your pierce/slash/
  pound decimates a serpent! 

  That's what I mean when I say primary attack. Usually with a 
  weapon, though you can attempt to kill barehanded if you're 
  feeling buff. Also used to a great extent at lower levels, but 
  it drops in importance killing avatar-level mobs and is 
  customarily near-utterly useless on quest mobs. Why? Just from 
  personal observation alone, the higher leveled mobs tend to 
  dodge/parry and somehow avoid more of them.

  As the RoD PK website (
  explains, the actual damage caused by each hit is a combination of
  many factors - how much damage your weapon is capable of, the 
  character's damroll, weaponskills, resistances, styles, etc.

  None of the final damage is going to help if that primary attack
  never hits in the first place. Adding hitroll helps at the low 
  character levels, but again, standard av equipment tends to 
  provide more than enough. 0-2 hits per round on an av mob is 
  fairly normal and nothing to worry about.

  The time to start wondering is if your attacks consistently 
  miss, and as covered in an earlier article, check nonmagic/magic
  weapons and different weapon types. Some mobs are just immune.

  If we were just going to kill a mob with primary attacks alone, 
  your first choice of character should always be something like 
  warrior-types or vampires. Those have second up to fourth or 
  fifth attack at high percentages, increasing the chances that 
  more of them will hit. Augurers are not too efficient here, 
  because if their second attack at max 33% misses, the third and 
  fourth attacks won't kick in.
  Secondary Attacks:
  Thankfully, we have secondary attacks to make fighting more 
  interesting. I'm going to lump most offensive skills and spells 
  under this category. It's basically anything you can hit a mob 
  with, per round or two, that isn't a primary attack.

  Some experimentation and comparison of damage inflicted should 
  let on which skills and spells hurt the most for each class. And
  if you don't know that circle (thieves), grasp (vampires), 
  quantum spike and acetum primus (mages) are the most commonly 
  used skills/spells to kill av mobs with, that's one large 
  electronic hermit cave you've been living in for a while. :)

  Tried and true, those skills inflict the most efficient damage, 
  providing your mob isn't immune to the damage, or has some sort 
  of nasty prog that heals it up again. Only way to find out is to

  Physicals (Secondaries that oughta be "Tertiaries"):
  This is that group that have swamped mostly warrior-types with a
  wide range of interestingly named skills, along with a few like 
  cuff and swat given to the spellcasters. Unless you're interested
  in roleplaying (read: imagining) your character being someone 
  like Bruce Lee, this is the very last resort of potentially 
  damaging skills.

  The sad fact is that the damage on these skills goes up a minute
  amount based on the character's level, and maxes out at about 
  15-25hp per blow (depends on which skill you use) and is further
  modified by sanctuary and protection. Yes, over time it does add
  up, but it's pinpricks compared to the force of an effective 
  circle/grasp/quantum rating somewhere in the few hundreds of hp.

  Effect of Alignment on Hitting:
  Another sad fact: I'm really not that biased against evil 
  characters, but some av mobs are affected by protection. 75% of 
  damage is considerably noticable compared to 100%. I was pretty 
  much converted after watching an evil and devout mage quantum 
  spike something for one damage level of difference consistently. 

  It could just be in my imagination, but runs do seem more 
  challenging and drag on slightly longer. Again, you don't -have-
  to be 100% efficient when you run something, but please make 
  sure the rest of the run members don't mind. 

  Brief Conclusion on Damage:
  It's going to be brief because I think hitting stuff is rather 
  obvious and instinctual to anyone. To maximize damage, you 
  arrange your character so that as many of his primary attacks 
  will hit, you give him as high a damroll as you can so that he 
  hurts, you use a character with a secondary attack that injures
  the mob the most, and you only use physicals to add damage when 
  you can't use anything else.
  Next month, the four general run strategies used in RoD. In the 
  future, I'm thinking towards things like run etiquette, tips for
  followers and leaders alike, how to lead a run, or possibly 
  something else. Feel free to let me know what you would find 
  most helpful!

     - Juliana Shadowfyre

  IGPK Report - by Mandasa                      Guild/Order Corner

  In this issue of the Cry I will report about the ongoing guild 
  pkills and news from guilds and orders. Additional information 
  about the guild pkills can be found online at 
               - Mandasa
  Guild pkills:
  Battles are fought two guilds versus two guilds. There are 5
  members from each guild making up a total of 10 per team. If
  fewer than 5 show from one guild then the team is short, they
  cannot use extra players from their pairing guild to fill the
  vacant slot(s). So make sure you come on out and support your
  The winning guilds receive 3 points, losing guild 2 points, 
  and a draw awards all guilds 1 point. Should a tie occur, 
  sudden death matches will be scheduled. The wars started in 
  November and are scheduled to end in February.

  Guild wars is brought to you with the hard work and effort of
  Darshanin, Bravadan, Tical, and Selina.

  -= Rules =-
  * 5 members of your guild may participate at one time.
  * 115 DR Cap.
  * 100 single shot heals.
  * 75 Manas.
  * Slist plus fly/sanc/springs.
  * No Looting.
  * No disarming.
  * No Poison Weapons.
  * No attack scrolls.
  * No handing off containers.
  * No Picking up or sac'ing items that do not belong to you.
  * No funny stuff.

  -= Previous Battles =-
  Date      Guild        vs    Guild            Who won? 
  Nov 21  Druid/Vamp     vs  Cleric/Thief     Cleric/Thief  
  Nov 24  Neph/Warrior   vs  Mage/Paladin     Mage/Paladin  
  Nov 28  Ranger/Pally   vs  Auggie/Thief     Auggie/Thief 
  Dec  1  Neph/Vamp      vs  Mage/Warrior     Mage/Warrior   
  Dec  5  Mage/Vamp      vs  Cleric/Paladin   Mage/Vampire 
  Dec  8  Ranger/Warrior vs  Thief/Druid      Thief/Druid 
  Dec 12  Cleric/Mage    vs  Neph/Auggie      Cleric/Mage  
  Dec 15  Mage/Ranger    vs  Druid/Auggie     Druid/Auggie 
  Dec 19  Warrior/Vamp   vs  Thief/Pally      Thief/Pally 
  Dec 22  Neph/Pally     vs  Druid/Ranger     Neph/Pally 
  Dec 29  Augurer/Vamp   vs  Warrior/Pally    Warrior/Pally  
  Jan  5  Neph/Thief     vs  Cleric/Ranger    Neph/Thief
  Jan  9  Cleric/Vamp    vs  Neph/Ranger      Cleric/Vamp
  Jan 12  Mage/Thief     vs  Druid/Pally      Mage/Thief
  Jan 16  Druid/Warrior  vs  Cleric/Auggie    Druid/Warrior
  Jan 19  Auggie/Warrior vs  Pally/Vamp       Pally/Vamp
  Jan 23  Cleric/Warrior vs  Ranger/Auggie    Ranger/Auggie
  Jan 26  Vamp/Ranger    vs  Warrior/Thief    Warrior/Thief

  -= Next Month's events =-
  Date     Time         Guild       vs    Guild 
  Jan 30   8:00pm   Neph/Cleric     vs  Auggie/Mage  
  Feb  2   2:00pm   Mage/Neph       vs  Druid/Cleric  
  Feb  6   8:00pm   Auggie/Pally    vs  Druid-Mage  
  Feb  9   2:00pm   Druid/Neph      vs  Thief/Ranger  
  Feb 13   8:00pm   Vampire         vs  Thief  

  Congratulations to everyone who's taken part in Guild Wars so
  far. Its been a blast! It's only with your help that the IGPKs
  have been so successful. 

  Guild/Order News - by Mandasa                 Guild/Order Corner

  News from the Dragonslayers:
  Dragonslayers teamed up with Ascendere to defeat Hastur the 
  Unspeakable in a glorious battle.

  News from the Guild of Clerics:
  We'd like to gratz our guildies Faradhi for his marriage to 
  Joanne and Nichollas for his marriage to Aylsira :) Also gratz
  our new members Glander, Shaelkire, and Mnenarchment, and gratz 
  to Tinqa for becoming a full member of the guild with all the 
  kumquats and dirty carrots deserving of a full guildie :)
  News from the Guild of Vampires:
  We'd like to congratulate and welcome the new leadership staff 
  of Wiglaff, Onteria, and Wadrol. Also welcoming Alsan and 
  Pardalis into full membership.

  IT was the time of the Black Sabbat and we spake unto our lord 
  and master of things evil and destruction, of seduction and 
  pain. And Lord Baal spoke, "The Dread Lord, Seth, a true power 
  in Despair, he I would have serve me in these Realms. Seek him 
  out my children, learn his power and his weaknesses, and return 
  to me."

  So did one of our greatest Justiciars, one of the Dark Lords 
  of Dis, gather forth the Swarm and invade the black marble 
  fortress. The Childer were much amused by the meager defenses
  this so-called Dread Lord had erected until they came upon the 
  monstrosity that is, The Chaos Maze. Crafty this Dread Lord was, 
  but that came not close to matching the true powers of deception 
  that are Baal. They saw through the swirling chaos to the center
  of the maze and stepped into the inner halls of Seth's Fortress.

  Cloaked in shadows, they watched the Magus in his insanity and 
  contemplated the turning of Jade upon her forefather. Then they
  came upon a dread creation. A golem made from the dark arts, the
  Justiciari decided not to encounter this dread being but created
  a portal into the Nether Planes, but not even this passage was 
  safe. Odd creatures in casings of metal and magic, walked half 
  in and half out of the planes. Mighty they were, but still they
  fell before the might of Baali. An odd wastrel, called 
  Maximillian fell beneath Baali's notice, but the Goddess of 
  Pleasure and Pain, they took as their own, destroying her mind, 
  body and soul.

  Then stood they before a black abyss, without shape or form, 
  it enveloped them, but the dark is a second home to the Childer
  and they came open the gateway to the Throne Room itself. Even 
  here could the flow of evil eddy out in waves to be felt by even 
  the blackest of hearts.

  And so did they enter, and gazed upon the Dread Lord himself, 
  sitting on his twisted throne of metal. Eyes of blood red fixed
  their gaze upon the Swarm, and a hollow booming laugh echoed
  throughout the room, for the melee had begun.

  Long and hard was the battle, but the Childer were successful.
  They had discovered something, something not heard of for quite
  some time upon Despair, and they returned to their lord and 
    "What is it my Servitors, what have you learned of this Seth?" 
  he commanded.
   "Master, there is more then we thought. There is... a pact..."

  January Quest Answers - by Elisabet                Quest Central

  The following are the 3 random winners from last month's quest.
  Congratulations to:  Zwanth, Turalyon and Garnolkum.  Please see
  Elisabet for your prizes.
  Below are the answers to last months quest, there was only one 
  incorrect entry.. so good job!

  1.  Sentinel
  3.  Nelkum
  4.  Aurora
  5.  Daemon Claw
  6.  Transylvania
  7.  A bag of semi-sweet charcoal
  8.  Set
  9.  %hhp %mm %vmv
  10. Froghemoth
  11. Sour Candy
  12. Dalach

  Secret word - Tinani is Cool

   \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/
  Spring is near, love is in the air! And our quest this month 
  ties it all together. We again have a crossword puzzle quest.
  Answer must be mudmailed to Elisabet by Midnight on February 20,
  2002. No late answers will be accepted. 3 random winners will be
  chosen from all correct entries. You may not submit with alts, 
  doing so will cause you to be banned from all further quests run
  by Elisabet. As always, if you have any questions, ASK - don't 
   \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/  \/

            2          [ ]
          1[ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]
           [ ]         [ ]          3
           [ ]         [ ]         [ ]    5     6
           [ ]        2[ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]
    3[ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]   [ ]         [ ]   [ ]  4[ ][ ][ ]
           [ ]         [ ]         [ ]   [ ]   [ ]
           [ ]     5[ ][ ][ ][ ]   [ ]   [ ]   [ ]
    6[ ][ ][ ][ ]      [ ]               [ ]
                                         [ ]
                                         [ ]
                              7          [ ]
                            7[ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]
                             [ ]         [ ] 8
                   8[ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]
                             [ ]            [ ]
    9[ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ][ ]         [ ]
                             [ ]            [ ]
                                            [ ]
                                            [ ]
                                            [ ]
                                            [ ]
                                            [ ]

  Down -
  1- I ____________ You.
  2- The spice of love.
  3- Thorny and sent to you by that special someone.
  4- *Isn't on the puzzle HA, HA screwed you up :P*
  5- To inspire with a foolish or extravagant love or 
  6- Greek god of love and former GoV Guild master.
  7- Spoken aloud to that person you love.
  8- That what awaits a Drow male after a matron is done with
  Across -
  1- A Greek God, this winged cherub shoots people with 
  2- Greek Goddess of love.
  3- The Muscle of love.
  4- A colour associated with valentines day.
  5- The "theme" of valentines day.
  6- Another colour associated with Valentine's day.
  7- What many get caught up in when they are with that 
     special someone.
  8- A type of card sent to people who you love.
  9- Name of a candy and pet name of that special someone.

  Nation Reports - by Khaimran + submissions          Introduction

    So!  You want to get involed in Roleplay within the Realms,
  but have no clue where to start. Hell, you're not even sure what
  Roleplay is exactly. 

    Putting it simply, role play is the art of using your 
  imagination to pretend to be someone or something else, within
  the context of Realms of Despair. You can be an ambassador, a
  dark sorceror, a peasant, or anything that takes your fancy.
  Still interested?

    For a start, you can turn on racetalk. That's the green 
  channel which you probably switched off as a level 3 character,
  and never bothered to turn on again. Active RPers within your
  race will generally use the channel, so hopefully queries will
  be answered over it.

    Next, read the relevant pages in the following article. You'll
  find out who your Nation Leader is, where your hometown is, and
  perhaps something to grab your attention. A mini-contents page
  for this section of the Cry is on HELP CRY
  A number of nations are not covered, due to their Nation Leaders
  not being available.

    Thirdly, if you're feeling adventurous, take a trip ne, ne, n
  from DH []. National Visions is the focal point for Roleplay
  within the Realms, and many recent plotlines are posted on the
  board there. There might even be RPers there who will be glad
  to act out a small scene or help you out with RP issues.

  For more information on Roleplay, visit

  The Sea Elf Nation, Aerandir    - HELP CRY43
  The Human Nation, Dunedain      - HELP CRY44
  The Half-troll Nation, Olog-Hai - HELP CRY45-46
  The inbred Lizardman Nation     - HELP CRY47
  The Dwarven Nation, Khazad      - HELP CRY48
  The Elven Nation, Quendi        - HELP CRY49-50
  The Drow Nation, Ilythiiri      - HELP CRY51-52   

  Enclosed in a lagoon of beautiful proportions is the Nation of 
  the Aerandiri, the sea-elves of the Realms. We are the elves of 
  the oceans, the sapphires and emeralds of elvenkind, the 
  wanderers from the tides beyond. Join us in our wild rides 
  across the seas upon silvery dolphins or taste the delicacies of
  The Lagoon's Call. Younger sea-elves are encouraged to take up 
  the Lien'eiaur elchuui to prove their worthiness and strength. 
  For those who came of age, the Alata ien'Einiurea is the next 
  step to achieving greater heights. 
  Throughout the centuries of history, the Aerandiri has remained 
  at peace with the various nations, taking a neutral stance 
  towards all cries of war and battle. However, recently, we 
  cannot, but heed the call of help from our own. An artifact of 
  great value is lost, and the Coral Throne herself seek desperate
  help to have it returned. Interested beings may contact the 
  Nation Leader Faya for more information or visit the Aerandiri 
  Nation website at
     - Faya Umbramnia

  The directions to the sea-elf hometown are:
  6w, 6n, nw, 2w, 2d, all w, se from Darkhaven Square.

  The Dunedain Nation, also known as the Human nation is one of 
  the largest races avaiable in the Realms of Despair. The 
  Dunedain are currently leaded by Noplex Darken, and have had a 
  long line of previous leaders.

  The Dunedain are governed by the Dunedain council and the Nation
  Leader. The council was chosen from Roleplayers in the Dunedain
  nation, by the Nation Leader, and other council members. 

  The Dunedain Nation is always looking for new talent to help 
  fill the ranks of it's Council, and all you need to know is how 
  to type, and have a passion for roleplaying! Just contact Noplex
  via Mudmail, or directly. 
    -Noplex Darken, Dunedain Nation Leader, Thain

  The Keep of Lomar is located 11n, 4e, n, nw from DH [].

  The half-troll nation has gone through major restructuration 
  since the last change in leader. Now it is ready to accept all 
  those who wish to be involved. A new council system, more 
  adapted to the race and RP styles of the realm, as many plots as
  there are members because of the "trainings" within those 
  councils, a finaly (relatively) active racetalk and new members 
  have blessed us in the recent past. To those who truly wish to 
  be active, many leadership positions are open to those who wish
  for more responsabilities. As with the other nations, some 
  recent changes in the hometown makes for a more refreshing 
  experience among us.

  To all those half-trolls who are bored of running Seth, many 
  plots have been started and are begging to be finished. A simple
  note in the hometown, or a quick e-mail to me, and everything 
  will be arranged.
  We are also looking at the possibilities of going farther than 
  role play, considering the more "elitist" side of our race, 
  with a great ammount of runner and pkillers. For more 
  information, contact Sareko through the usual mudmail or tells.

  Until then, Decomor, Olog'hai...
  Francois Ward, Sareko's player

  The Ruins of T'Man are located all s, 2e, ne from DH [].

   (A note from an unknown lizard was left here,
    King Dekkath scratched out of the top of the
    birch bark they call "stationary"...)
   | Come on down to a place far from home....   |
   |  A land unknown, where lizards roam(ed)!    |
   |               +   -   +                     |
   |Have a bowl of soup or some fine berry wine  |
   | We guarantee you'll have a wonderful time   |
   |   Its just a shame that we're extinct       |
   |  It all started when my sister winked....   |
   |               -   +   -                     |
   |The shop in Tribal Swamplands will sell you  |
   |alcohol but they only take Darkhaven Express |-=+
   +-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-+  |
                           | Drop in Today!*        |
                              *At your own risk!

  For those 'adventurous' enough, the Lizardman Hometown, Tribal
  Swamplands, is located all w, 2s, e, s, w, s, 2w, s, w, d, e
  from Darkhaven Square.

  The Khazad Nation's long period of isolation within the 
  protective Canyons of the Reach is falling away once more, 
  giving rise to something entirely different.
  The beloved Athane Poli, newly come into authority, cares for 
  all life within these Realms without prejudice or judgement.  
  She is a refreshing wind of change sweeing through the Canyons, 
  as rare and remarkable as the Gardens of Qetag.
  The Ezbad Mbwana LifeWind fills the post of ambassador with 
  honor and distinction, and is always available to receive 
  delegates from the other peaceful nations of the Realms.
  Dwarves who would like to help make the Nation great should 
  speak with the Athane Poli, Dashiva Silverlode who now Captains
  the Royal Guard, the Head Scout Ryals Darkstone, or myself.
  Dwarves wishing to share in the camaraderie of the Reach need 
  only go there.
        Yeroc DeLeis StarProfit, First of the Khazad Nation

  Qetag's Reach is located all w, 2n, 2nw, d, e from DH []

  The Elf Nation is one of the more active of the Nations in the 
  Realm. Right now we have one small plot and one major plot going 
  on. Both allow plenty of room for players that want to develop 
  strong character backgrounds to do what they wish in either. 

  For now the High Council positions are full, but there are some 
  Lower Council positions open plus the chance for any that wish 
  to join in the role playing. Right now the Elven Army is being
  gathered, as is the Home Guard. There are a few other things I 
  am working on getting together for the Quendi Nation. 

  Other than the Army and Home Guard I will implement a branch for 
  magic users and seperate smaller branches of the Home Guard and
  Army for rangers/scouts. Each one has or will have its own High
  Council member to go to for guidance or questions concerning 
  anything in character or out of character. It is also encouraged
  for players to feel free to make their own plots. They can be
  totally new or a subplot off of a current one. 

  For those wishing to get involved in the EN mudmail Asurmen
  for a CoAQ (Coming of Age Quest). 

   - Vernese Elessendil, Tari of the Elven Nation

  The Isle of Irrybis is located:
  7n, w, 6n, w, n, w, 2nw, ne, d, s, all w from DH []

  The Drow nation:
  Our history is one filled with an endless cycle of destruction, 
  death, and rebirth. Our ways are simple - Abide by the 
  Quarvalsharess and you may live long enough to serve Her. We are 
  a matriarchal society because our females tend to be strongest 
  and because Lloth deems it so.  There are other religions to 
  follow but to do so is to bring about your own demise.

  At this point in time the only thing needed to become involved 
  with the  Ilythiiri is an interest to do so. Becoming a member of
  a house in another matter. There are eight noble houses in the 
  Drow nation: Ss'jelda, Char'us, Be'lal, Ri'phlith, Orthae Waess,
  Usst'golhyrr, Veldrin'velve, and Ul'Ilindith. To join a noble 
  house you must speak directly with that houses Matron or in some 
  cases Patron. You can also join the army by speaking with General
  Desidio. You may want become a merchant or rogue, both of which 
  require no authorization. This process is subject to change at 
  any time. 

  There are very few plots in motion right now but all 
  ideas are welcome. You may want to post a note about your idea 
  on   the Drow Nation note board located in the City of 
  Iniquity and have people vote on it as a way to sign up or show 

   May Shadows protect and guide you,
     L'elamshin d'lil Ilythiiri zhah ulu har'luth jal
  *sealed in midnight blue wax, stamped with the crest of the 
   Royal House*

  The current leader of the Drow is Zyandra, and their hometown is
  the City of Iniquity, located:
  11n, w, 2n, w, n, w, 2nw, ne, d, n, open thicket, d, from DH [].

  Ask the CoE - by Kali, and Khaimran                      Classes

  There will be a number of modfications to slists of the current 
  classes. I will leave the nature and specificity secret until 
  the port, though I imagine most classes will be pleased with the
  There will be one totally new class at the time of the port.  
  The modifications to the Nephandi class are so total that I 
  would be tempted to mention them as a new class.  Any old spells
  which did not function have been repaired or altered and new 
  spells/skills have been added to give them a bit of a boost.
  They have slightly better skills with weapons and at least one 
  means to compensate for their poor defensive skills.
  The new class being added will not be Pirate, despite what a 
  number of people seem to think.  Arrrr.

  Statrep and Score for Unauthed Chars...
  The removal of score from Spectral Gates is not an issue of
  advantage or disadvantage.  We are aware that people want good 
  base attributes for their characters and they will move heaven 
  and earth to get them.  However, having eighty clones running 
  around with names like Dannoandaxokononaka, Jizaziemen and 
  Jannoandaxokononakajizaziemen does something to spoil the
  atmosphere of the Realms (Apologies to anyone who happens to 
  have those names, no personal offense intended).  While Realms 
  of Despair might not be as roleplay intense as some other muds, 
  we are also not as numerically fixated as some other muds.  We 
  strive to maintain a medium between the sheer enjoyment of hack
  and slash while not forcing players to engage in roleplay, if 
  they do not find activity of that sort to their taste.  The 
  easiest way to maintain that medium is subtle manipulation of 
  the atmosphere.  Names which give goo attributes are only 
  minimally more difficult to get.  If you truly want them, it 
  just takes more time.

  Oh, it also cuts down on the immortals seeing a ten letter name 
  twenty-six times with every letter of the alphabet tacked on to
  the front in a ten second time span.

  There have been two requests for new Orders raised in the past 
  few months, but we are not actively looking to add any new 
  Orders at the present time. This does not rule out these ]
  applicants or any future ones, but we have not seen a 
  demonstrated need for any new Orders at this juncture.

  The Shadowy Path...
  The Pkill Conclave has recently had a few items passed involving
  stock equipment and deadly only areas, but these goals will take
  some time to implement.  New clans and clan equipment is likely
  to accompany these additions.

  Role-play has always been, for lack of a better term, a 
  grassroots organization within Realms.  We have an active 
  roleplay community but our stance has always been very much that
  roleplay is dependent on player initiative and receives only 
  minimal immortal support.  Having said that, I will contradict
  myself and now mention that the hometowns have all received the
  offer of cosmetic overhauls, as well as donation addition, which
  is currently in the process of being completed by Moonbeam.  
  Raltaris also does an excellent job of coordinating activities
  for the Nations and being a liason between the mortal and 
  immortal communities.

  Realms of Despair has a fantastic crew of immortals.  The number
  of immortals we currently have is satisfactory for a mud of our 
  size.  Too many results in a lack of projects and immortals 
  becoming bored, idle or combative.  Too few results in a lack of
  hands to deal with the day to day tasks of keeping the Realms 
  running in an orderly fashion.  As far as distribution goes, our 
  only concern would be that the rewards for immortals are few. 
  As much as we would like to promote deserving immortals, 
  sometimes we are unable to because we would end up with ten level
  65 immortals.

    The Cry of Despair would like to thank Kali for the time he
    gave for this article, and that which he contributes to the
    running of the MUD.

  Funny Bones - collected by Khaimran + Silverwind Who's + Where's

  Brewcrews have feelings too...
  who ds
  Betheny.                              I owe, I owe, it's. 
  Fredrico.        Brew you dogs!     (  off to brew I go . 
  Justtin.        /                  )                \   . 
  Leilani.       0  /\   0   o   O    (    O   o   0   0  . 
  Lizleani.     -+-/  ) /-  /-  /-         -\  -\  -\  -\ . 
  Wenalamik.     |      |   |   |     *     |   |   |   | . 
  Yardan.       / \    / \ / \ / \  /***\  / \ / \ / \ / \. 
  Zursanpikkis. _______________[Dawnbreaker]______________. 


  The cast of The Princess Bride decided to make an appearance...
  Players near you in Spectral Gate:
  | Buttercup                    | Descending the Hillside
  | Westley                      | Descending the Hillside
  | Humpnerdink                  | A View of the Realms
  | Vizzini                      | Through the Field
  | Fezig                        | Through the Field
  | Inigo                        | Descending the Hillside

  Ienna: Bots can do it 24/7 [BOT]. 
  Kirlett. A weekend not wasted is a wasted weekend. 
  Faradhi Sobriet-Treves, lord of the trance. 
  Shingo Your crops will be harvested. Pestilence is futile. 
  Llamvak screams his war cry... 'Snootchy nootchies'.
  Tearn, stranger than a gang of drunken mimes. (
  Nebka LifeBringer, "Lag sucks, Then you die" [AA]. 
  Einik isn't a slut, he's benevolent...
  Wodko LifeBringer, professionally licensed hypocrite. 
  Poems - submitted by Faradhi                               Words

  Neglect, Part One
  The thing began to whimper
  It knew not where it lay
  Made some noise but no one heard
  Grew darker did the day
  The thing began to shiver
  So cold down on the floor
  Made a move but no one watched
  Grew darker than before
  The thing began to ponder
  Out of sight, out of mind
  Made a thought but no one knew
  The darkness was a bind
  The thing began to struggle
  In despair it cried
  Made a try but no one helped
  In the dark lay down and died

  Neglect, Part Two
  Another day was dawning
  But the thing had changed
  Died the death that wasn't
  Free by day it ranged
  Made a noise and it was heard
  Then moved and it was seen
  Thought and it was known
  Knew not what this could mean
  Tried to understand it
  Could not really see
  Someone came and helped it
  Together they would be
  The thing no longer saddened
  Knew now where it lay
  And knew who lay beside it
  Grew brighter did the day

  Drow Cookbook - by Tinani                                  Words

  Welcome to Cooking With The Drow an in-depth look at cool food 
  items that are fun to eat and taste great. The recipe below has 
  been translated from the common mud language to be of use in the
  "other" place (shudder). Anyway, here is the ultimate recipe for
  the original Peppermint Ambrosia (Milkshake).
  What do you need?
  1         Canopy Special          (Banana)
  1/2 cup   Moo Juice               (Milk)
  2         Treasure Box            (Eggs)
  4 scoops  Elisabet Melters        (Vanilla Ice-cream)
  1 tsp     Imm Blossom Extract     (Vanilla Extract)
  1/2 tsp   Root Juice              (Peppermint Extract)
  1         Wild Boar               (Blender)
  1 to 4    Drinkcons               (Mugs)

  * Add in your milk eggs and bananas into the blender and 
    liquefy them together.
  * Add in the ice-cream (More ice-cream = thicker).
  * Blend all lumps out.
  * Add in the vanilla extract.
  * To create the wonderful peppermint flavor add in the
    peppermint extract (available at most bulk food stores,
    and artificial extract will work just as well) and serve.
  * This recipe is not unlike a candy cane and if desired 
    different extract flavors can be added instead of the 
    peppermint extract for a different flavor. To make this a 
    vanilla milkshake leave out the peppermint extract. This is
    a wonderful drink that helps one relax.
      - Tinani Blood'Drake, Killer of Small Bunnies

  Elisabet's Corner - by Elisabet                    E's Corner

  Greetings to all our of our faithful Cry of Despair readers!
  I hope you are happy to see a large issue again, chock full of
  exciting news and stories.  We will be having our bi-yearly
  staff meeting soon and just wait and see what we come up with

  Khaimran and all the staff have done a fabulous job this month,
  and we truly hope you have enjoyed it. If you have any questions,
  comments, concerns, suggestions, or anything you'd like to see
  published in the upcoming issues of the Cry of Despair - please
  post it on our public board located at e, s, 2u, s, w, s of 
  Darkhaven Square, or you may mudmail me personally.
    Thanks and Merry Valentine's Day,
          - Elisabet Evenstar-Atal